Pregnancy {The Beginning}

{And the pregnancy updates begin! I honestly don't care if you're not interested. I am interested in documenting the past few months [and of course the upcoming!]. My blog has never really had a focus so why not! My weeks change every Sunday so I figure every Monday I'll so some updating. I do, however, have some catching up to do!}

The week before New Years was crazy. I was having mood swings -- nothing too unusual, because, hey! I'm a girl -- but I was feeling really down. My New Years plans ended up being a bust and I felt really, really sad! I mean, was I really THAT sad about not having a big night out in this hotel room I booked on the beach? Sure. It was possible but my reaction just seemed a bit MUCH. Even for me. I wasn't sure if something was up.

New Years Eve was a nice, chill day. I caught up on chores, books, picture uploading, TV, etc. It was awesome. Once it got closer to the evening and I knew Scott would be home soon... ready to party. Just because I felt like I *should* make sure I wasn't preggo before hitting some champagne hard... I made a trip to CVS. And, because I couldn't JUST buy pregnancy tests... I got some ice cream too.

I got home, peed, and waited. I was just doing this for peace of mind. I mean, there was no way I could be preggo already. No flippin' way.

WAY. Two pink lines -- albeit one of them faint -- meant the big fat Positive. I'm like ... okay. I bought a two pack. Let's try again.

Yep. Another positive.

I think I started talking to myself at this point and said "No way. No f*ing way!" I mean, it wasn't in a negative way or anything... it just was sudden. It wasn't a SURPRISE but it wasn't something that I had expected. You know how you hear that rumor it takes a while to get your body back to normal after years on the pill... lies! All lies! ;)

I got it together and realized my husband would be home soon. I was in pajamas. Ick. So, I changed into a dress and a cardigan... even if we were home I wanted to look a little cute at least.
I wanted to find a way to tell him, so I went to our "I Like" book. I got this from Plum District with a dealio and it's cute. We don't write in it every day but on weekends I used to hand it off to him to write something. You're supposed to write one thing you like about your partner every day. Anyway, we finished one page for December and I wrote on the last line: I like that you're going to be a DAD in 2012.

He came home, had to finish some assignments for work, and I sat. Patient. I watched some of MTV's New Years Special and felt old. WHO ARE THESE PEOPLE?! I helped prepare dinner but it was cold outside so I put my pajamas back on. Wow. Lame. My husband was trying to push me to make a drink or something to liven up the mood. I declined til dinner. I was really trying to put it off. I was going to ask him to check the book once he was done with work... but he was taking his time. I was SO antsy.

I didn't know what to do with myself. So... we are out on the patio and he is about to smoke and he said come on, make a drink... and I couldn't handle it. I'm on the patio, he is about to smoke in my face (gross!) and I can't drink! So I just blurted it out.

I think he said "really?" with a smile.

I finally was like you wouldn't read the book! I tried! He said the book would have been a better way to tell him than just blurting it out... and I'm like, yeaaaaa I TRIED!!!

Anyway, so that was that. We had steak and lobster for dinner but the lobster made me not want to eat it. I don't know why.

I woke up the next morning to go grab a digital test. Pregnant. I just needed some more proof.

I spent New Years Day in probably a daze. What do I do? Why can't I drink coffee? Can I have a damn Pepsi? I'm like what should I DO!

The timing was kind of crazy—Finding out at the beginning of a new year that you're expecting. We knew it would be this year...I really just didn't think so soon! Also, my new job's insurance kicked in ON January 1st... so that is some timing right there.

I mean I didn't have any signs. I did take a nap two days in a row which is unusual. I never take naps, I just go to sleep early regularly...

January:

I am having trouble getting into my clothes in the morning, I feel so bloated in the AM. I am fine by lunch time... clothes fitting back to normal. I took a picture of myself this morning and my face was bizarrely round.

My first appointment wasn't until the end of January. I think I was nervous at my appointment but I wasn't showing it. I was just really quiet. Mildly uncomfortable. I didn't cry or get butterflies when I saw the baby. It was just like, there it is. I mean, don't get me wrong, I'm excited. It just was a pleasant experience and I was eerily calm.

We saw Baby B and heard the heartbeat -- 150 beats per minute! It was over pretty quickly and then the blood work and normal doctor stuff happened. Everything seemed pretty good.

We told our parents in person when they came down to visit for dinner and I slowly told my close girlfriends. I couldn't NOT tell.

End of my first month! I look normal but there is SUCH a difference between then and now. Yikes!